Jan 30, 2013

confession

It's been awhile since I've done a confessions post. And today I'm feeling like it's quite fitting! 

While I have a huge heart, am very sentimental and love little moments in life. Truth is, I can be an eye-rolling sarcastic bitch. 
And that's putting it lightly. 
Not in a mean, I hate you sort of way. But in a way that makes everyone laugh and love me. I'm that friend you love. Un-fake. Because lets be honest, no one wants a fake friend. If I'm asked a question, I give an honest answer, even if I know it will not be well received. Sometimes I try my best to sugar coat it, by adding sarcasm in (#notthebestsugarcoater). But truth be told, if you ask me how you look, imma tell ya. You wouldn't want to walk around thinking you look like Jennifer Anniston while in reality you look like a strung out Courtney Love on a bad day.

Truth is, I cuss like a sailor sometimes. I try not to, and I know it's not classy, but shit happens. Sometimes using the word fuck is the only way to really get my point across. It doesn't make me a bad person, or maybe it does?? It's ok, you can judge me. 

I love my kids more than my life itself, but sometimes... I just want to put them back in my uterus! While I love having tea parties, sometimes I want to say EF a tea party, give me a bottle of wine, the whole damn bottle! Sometimes I catch myself saying "IF YOU SAY MOM ONE MORE TIME!" 

Truth is, I despise those people who use God as an excuse or a figure to hide behind. 
I believe in God. I am a Christian. But I do not believe that I should hide behind him for my thoughts or actions. They are my own. You can use all the scripture you want to defend your morally wrong actions, but I can find one that contradicts yours. BET! (ok, well maybe not me, myself, but I can definitely call my Grandmother who is a Minister and she'll find the scripture I'm wanting to use to prove you wrong)

Did you know I'm not married?? So many people are SHOCKED at this. Even people who have known us for years. I guess people just assume we are, because we have 3 kids together and I'm a SAHM, but we are definitely living in sin. We feel married. We share every aspect of our life like we're married. We've been together longer than most married couples we know. I'm not sure why everyone gives us (Craig) shit when they find out we're not. What's the big deal. Sure I want a ring.. but who doesn't?? I like to think of us as Brad and Angelina (you caught me, I like to think of myself as Angelina with Brad... shhhh).

I would post about God and then write about being a sinful whore in the next paragraph.

Truth is. I don't care what anyone thinks. I lost myself writing this blog in the past, worrying about giving away too much info, getting too deep and was afraid to be myself. Afraid to be judged. But I'm ok with it now. I hope I'm not judged in a negative light, but it's ok if you judge me. Just know, I judge you for judging me!

Haters gonna hate. Bitches gonna bitch.

And as my amazing talented friend Jay Hussle said once:
I'm the best thing since breath bitch, suffocate!
(seriously, that's the best thing ever said!)

xoxo


5 comments:

  1. Hahah, this post made me love your blog even more!! I love that you are honest and you are living your life they way you see fit. I wish more people were like that. Keep it up, you're great! :)

    Ps. Cussing like a sailor really does help sometimes!

    http://thejustincases.blogspot.com

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  2. I don't think its anybody's place to judge. And even if they do, chances are they wish they had the balls to say what you say and do what you do, the way you do it. And I love this post. Because I know I have my moments when I curse like a sailor and when I do its a relief. I got it off my chest. And to be true to ourself just seems to be the hardest thing for many. But life is too short. Be you. :)

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  3. hahaha, omg, i love you.

    just discovered your blog. loveeee it!

    can't wait to read more.

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  4. i have no idea how i discovered your blog but this was the first post i read and damn! what a brilliant introduction!

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  5. I can't stand it when people talk about "living in sin" when you're in a committed, loving relationship, even if you live together/don't practice abstinence. ESPECIALLY if there are kids. To me having Christian values means being kind to others, sharing what you have, forgiveness, and compassion. It does not mean putting down others for doing things differently than you would.

    I only know you from your blog- I've been reading for a couple years now- but you seem like a wonderful human being and a loving mother who is raising her kids to be good people. Reading your blog has made me really excited to have kids some day!

    My fiancé and I have lived together for almost three years now, and I have been fortunate in that the only people accusing me of living in sin have been strangers that didn't know us (or care to know us). We had many conversations about kids and marriage, and made the decision to be extra careful with birth control because we weren't ready. So far so good! But I don't think you need a ring to have happy kids, happy family, and a good life.

    Wow, that's more than I intended to write... but that's just my two cents. Keep doin what you're doin, lady!!

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